it's aimi bitch.

There are three things that you never call me; Judgemental, Ignorant and Immature. Or ugly, but that's a whole different topic (: I spent 10 days at a religious camp, which my family does every year. I'm supposed to enjoy it, but this time i didnt. I mean, hanging out with my friends was good but I missed my boyfriend too fucking much. There was also another thing, I got the rude awakening aboout religion. I had known it for a long time, but this camp just re enforced it for me. Religion to me is something that has no tolerance of self expression other than what religious people think is the 'norm'. It makes me sick. Growing up in an SDA family i was taught the ways of religion as i would have been. I have no resentment towards my mother though, only to religion. Religion is life controlling, you pretty much can't make decisions for yourself or express yourself aesthetically, verbally or even physically. So, you know, fuck that. They say come as you are, but they really mean come as you are if you meet this criteria. I have alot more to say but i dont know if your brain or my flicking fingers can take it. But i'll have you know that not all religious people are like that. Some are very open minded and accepting of different people, and i respect them. But, the thing is, the way that those "different" people are is still not "right" to them. But then again what is really right? Or normal? Or even good for that matter? Nothing is normal. There is no such thing as normal. Normal does not exist. Before i came to my senses about religion i was a rather judgemental person because i wasn't open minded. But now i am, i accept humans as humans and treat humans as humans, unless of course theyre dickheads but then there's the obvious. I have Muslim friends, Satanic friends, Athiest friends, Chrtistian friends, Wiccan friends. I respect their views and beliefs. I don't want to bash them with my ideas because they don't do it to me. Now, i sound all self righteous and shit but i'm just saying, reason number one for not calling me judgemental? Because i'm not. I have no right to judge anyone, i mean, look at the person I am. I'm not perfect, who am I to judge? I know for a fact that on the surface I come across as an intimidating nasty person, i may even seem up myself. But i love getting judgemental looks to be honest. Because I can't wait until those people get to know me if they ever do and become enlightened, yes, enlightened. I've wasted enough time trying to be what everyone wants, its their turn now. But even if they don't get to know me, its funny anyway. But hey, i'm not judging. There is a different between thoughtful mocking and judging. And a different between judging and having an opinion when it is open to be given. So don't give me any bullshit about being judgemental when i'm just giving an opinion. You're smart enough to know the difference aren't you? But we're all just the same inside. When it all comes down to it we're all the same no matter how different we are. We cry, we laugh, we hurt, we smile, we fall in love and we fall to pieces. The sight of your naked eye isnt even the mere surface of who we are.

I'm fifteen years old. But in my lifetime, i'd probably surprise you with how much i know or even how far my vocabulary stretches. Or my fucked up points of view for that matter. Or the fact that I actually know what i'm talking about half the time. Or that fact that I am very good at sarcasm. I'm smart, but not in the way you expect me to be. I'm open minded, but that doesnt mean that i dont get pissed off. I'm mature, but i'm fucking fifteen years old. Perhaps there's a different between my life and yours, perhaps i've been through more or less than you have, perhaps i sometimes have a valid point to make. Oh, but wait, i'm fifteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen. Yeah, i am. So? Geez if i were famous you'd take me seriously, just because my word aint out there. I don't like to fight, but i can put up a good one verbally, if you were to throw a punch at me i'd probably snap and die. My tongue is my weapon.

I'm blank to what i wanna say now, i'll probably winge about it in my next post.


till next time,